The Secret Tory ​

The Secret Tory is a Conservative, national treasure and service station enthusiast. They are purported to be a sitting member of the UK Parliament and have been leaking reams of sensitive information from the heart of the Conservative government for the last three years.

A modern day polymath, they enjoy bloodsports, destabilising liberal democracy and several non-executive directorships, including one at Southern Water where they claim to have been responsible for over three-hundred beach closures in 2021 alone. They currently hold the Conservative Party conference 'WKD Blue Challenge' title, after decimating Ken Clarke's infamous seven bottle record which had stood for thirteen years. 

In the Diary of a Secret Tory they are lifting the lid on one of the biggest periods of upheaval in recent memory (certainly since Nick Clegg broke George Osbourne's printer at the treasury) - the last twelve months of British politics. When asked 'why?' the Secret Tory replied "Out of a sense of duty, honour and a very strong desire to cash in.”

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